sinking slowly into miasma
into slow-sand  into mire
into immobility
with such clarity.

How cruel can life be?

What was faced during life
traumas dealt with
crushing emotional blows
intellectual defeats
missed opportunities
uncalled for discriminations
injustices intentional and unintentional
is nothing.

How cruel can death be?

No living to the full
to slip away in sleep.
No sudden rending pain
shocking your systems
frying your circuits
then gone  peace.
No sudden stroke
numbing your muscles
from which return is possible.

How cruel can decline be?

Fully aware  cognizant
slowly watching yourself sink
patronised by strangers
talking at you in third person.
No pain to let you know you’re alive
it’s managed by morphine.
No discrimination here.
Taking no mind of your cleverness
your life accomplishments
your talents  beauty  knowledge.
All slowly phased out
till you’re a mind in a body
refusing to let you speak
unresponsive  leaden
manhandled by strangers
never alone  family in vigil-mode
interminably listening to conversations
you can’t join  you don’t want to hear.
Lying breathing open-mouthed
intermittent deaths occasionally
in a holding pattern
for hours  days  even weeks.

Do your dead siblings wait in the shadows?
Can you let go and join them?
Must you cling on while family linger?

How wonderful will death be?

(C) Jud House  10/04/2013 * * * * *

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